[Original post by Elliot Mogerman – Transferred from yahoogroups.com]
We all stayed in one room at the hostel in lvuv. The owner was from australia and had a nice collection of antique guns, missles, and other war material like helmets, uniforms, etc. So quickly got our things organized and hit the lovely town. The architecture was amazing and the brits, twisting our arms, made us drink way too much. We put up a fight and after it was all over, like history repeating itself, we finally had to leave the british and start our own journey. Hahah, ok back to the story. As we wondered around looking like inspired tourists with beers in each hand, maybe a camera or two, we jumped on a funny looking street train or basically a tour bus. It was a slow riding, very boring tour of the city. We found out there might have been an english version to listen to, but of course my a.d.d kicked in because i couldn’t listen to the automated tour guide on the speaker system. So our little game of making people smiled was back in play. First a song came on while we were stopped at an intersection, so i began to dance in my normal way. The people on the bus started cracking up. So as we were riding around mike and i started waving and making faces rediculously at locals, other tourists, whomever was in the war path. Adam joined in and was getting just as many points as us. Most of the people in our group were laughing so hard tears were being wiped from their eyes. I even convinced a kid walking by to give me his balloon. I ended up handing it to a little gir behind me practicing for her frowning and non smiling time here. I still am not sure if she ever smiles even after all our goofiness. Oh yeah, i ordered a hot chocolate, or what i thought was, and it was a glass of melted chocolate. Holy fuck, it was like drinking a huge melted hershey bar. I added water until it tasted like hot chocolate, but it was still good. I digress, ok, so in ukraine every single phone must be required to play techno for the ring tone. Also, remember the little country that had no name and is actually not a country but in land dispute? It is called transinista. We went to a “irish” pub and i guess a well known little pub locally to watch the football games. We met a few russians who were very cool. Also, this little irish/canada/something else alcoholic who is probably dead now somewhere in ukraine. Long story, but i hope he gets back home ok, because seriously, he’s that guy but a million times worse. Crazy hulligans. The next day we went to an underground club that requires a password to get in. We had it and ate a wonderful dinner after they gave us complimentary honey vodka shots. It was a little awkward as the culture in this place was pro war and very negative, racist, towards the people they have been at war with. One of the brits wasn’t terribly comfortable but was cool and informed us of some of the meaning so we had an idea what was going on. We all went to a club called fashion. First, people can’t give directions here. We ask where this well known club is and they point. Not how far, or which side of street, anything, just point. After we passed it 6 times we found it. Actually, it was next to one of favorite cafes where we played pool and darren got locked in the bathroom from the inside. So in the club were tons of young women, and a few old guys. Everyone had their 3 foot space bubble. God for bid you crossed it. We ended up drinking three bottles of vodka, danced all night – boys gone wild! Then we had to escort Mike out after he gracisouly finished off the third bottle. As he was feeding the plants outside, a few friendly officers came over to make sure we were all ok and wanted nothing more than to help us anyway they could. Ok, sarcastic but it was pretty funny. I spoke to the semi english speaking officer and matthew spoke to the bad municipal policeman. After 15 minutes of them wanting our passports and money they eventually let us go. I was telling one how my great, grandmother is from a city not far away and we are tourists taking care of a fallen comrad. We also saw a real reruvian flute band dressed like native american indians drawing huge crowds in the square. Those guys must be making a fortune. Hey all i know is the brits can dance and drink. We video taped him trying to go to sleep when he was hammered. He grunted a rolled around a lot. then snores came from him that would break a sizemograph, we all crashed. Had a buffet breakfast and some pizza for lunch. A few more beers, walking around the city, and then trained it back to kiev. Still no paperwork for mike and we are getting seriously delayed. We just ate breakfast and mike is sleeping off our vacation from our vacation. When he wakes, we have to reconstruct our russia/khazakstan timeframe to accomodate the delay. Adam also gave us some great contacts we will take advantage of in russia inluding a british language education. Matthew provided some russian language education and some cool dance moved i will bring back to the states, and Darren gave us a taste of the giggle but we never were fortunate enough to hear the full giggle. All this way on our trip and no s-man giggle. A canadian named sam, yesterday, also gave us some information on a great idea about obtaining a masters degree in europe. Anyway, just doing some thinking. game on and good luck in poland guys. we will rock n roll in russia.